Whether you’re trying to convince Moammar Gadhafi to stand down or trying to work with coworkers, you are at war. I don’t mean this in a bad/negative way, I mean it in a real(istic) way. People are competitive and out for their own. They may be your coworkers and friends but in my experience, it’s still competitive; it’s still a battle and a daily challenge.
To me, the elements of collaboration are as follows: the people, roles, relationships, events, actions, and artifacts/documents/messages have to be defined and shared effectively for a given relationship to be successful and beneficial.
Sure we can operate under other pretenses: avoidance, control, dictatorship, and subversion but our goal should always be collaboration and partnership. We may grow tired and give up on certain objectives, but we have to keep going on, keep forming the relationship and agreement.
In work and business I think this is far easier (and more necessary) than in personal relationships. But you have to define these things.
I’m dealing with one of our senior executives at work no, trying to form a clear and beneficial relationship between the sales/account management/business development functions and the project management/planning/delivery function. This distinction/division is relatively new (probably better stated as IMMATURE) within our company, so there is a lot to do. First we have to figure out each others’ incentives and interests and then we can figure out a working relationship / process / protocol that works and benefits the organization.
These things take time but if you stay after it you (and the other party) will win.
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